I Wasn't a Great Student, and I Don't Regret It

Can you look back at your school days with pride,or do you feel you could have done better? A while back I had a chat with my mom about my struggles in school as a teenager. I always really wanted to do great work and excel, but I had a hard time being present with my studies. I would begin each semester with grand plans for straight A’s, but my grades were consistently average. I had my eye on the end game without realising that the whole purpose of school was the learning and not the grade.

My mom asked if I had regret about the way I operated in school. Initially I wanted to say I did a bit, because I do often wish that I had made better use of my education. But I had to say no, because all of those struggles and choices have brought me to where I am today. Because I wasn’t on the traditional academic track I made different decisions than my peers that brought me to a life that I couldn’t even have dreamed of as a teenager. I say this to make the point that becoming who we are is filled with both mistakes and triumphs, and both are perhaps equally important.

I titled this mini print ‘Become’ because being present with my own growth is something I still struggle with. I have so many ideas for prints and not enough time to realise them all. It can lead to anxiety as a result of the feeling of being behind. It's as though I’m in a race to become a better artist, a better wife, a better friend, a better business owner at all times. I often need to remember that becoming is an unfolding as much as it is a creation, a mix of both wanted and unwanted aspects, and that both are good.

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Much love and happy becoming,

Ellen